Preconception – My Kid Will Be A Mini-Me!
The Lie: When my kid comes along, not only will she be just like me, but we’ll always agree and have so much fun. This should be awesome!
The Reality: So one, I had a boy, something girly, glittery, shiny lip-gloss wearing, pink-loving me never thought possible. I honestly believed I had so many girl genes in me, that there was no way a boy would slip into my world. Wrong. Also, because the gods are funny, my boy is ALL boy. No pink, no ballet, no girl anything, and trust me, boy did I try. I bought this kid all sorts of multi-gender toys and books. I pushed “boys can like dolls and girls can like trucks” talks on him. But no, all he wants to do is roar loudly and push a million little hot wheels around for hours on end. Secondly, we’re nothing alike. I was a strong extrovert as a kid. I’d talk to anyone, acted in a million plays and joined the debate team. My son is the extreme opposite. Slow to warm, shy and pigs will fly before this kid gets up in front of anyone. Unlike me he loves sports, Lego blocks and plenty of alone time. I really thought my kid would be more like me.
The Perks: Being the mom of someone shy has taught me a lot. I never understood how differently the world treats extroverts vs. introverts, and that alone has been an eye opener. Now I can build Lego structures, roar as well as anyone, and I can try and sometimes succeed at sporty activities. Plus, while I always thought I’d contribute feminism to the world via killer skills passed on to a daughter, now I know that one of the best way to push for gender equality is to raise boys who respect girls. Having a boy who is unlike me in every way possible has for sure been different than I imagined, but also a great learning experience.